The uncle of the Bibas family has revealed that he can no longer bear to look at the heart-rending picture taken on October 7 of his niece-in-law Shiri clinging onto her sons Kfir and Ariel.

The image, taken from footage filmed by Hamas during the family’s abduction, shows a terrified Shiri Bibas clutching her two red-headed sons in her arms, surrounded by terrorists. Widely shared throughout the world, it quickly became one of the defining images of October 7.

But Yair Keshet, 62, the uncle of 34-year-old Yarden Bibas – who is also a hostage but is being held separately from his wife and children – says it is “too painful” to look at.

Upon first seeing the picture online, just hours after the kidnapping took place, he says his whole family experienced “extreme shock, [disbelief], and despair”, feelings which have not alleviated in the months since.

He told the JC: “When we saw this picture, we were in shock. It was so, so difficult. We couldn’t believe it. I saw her face, her eyes; she was horrified. There is no other word for it except fear. It was written so clearly on her face, in her look.”

Yair says the picture often crops up in numerous WhatsApp groups he is a part of, on the news, in newspapers and online, and always without warning.

“I personally can’t look at it [anymore]. It’s too painful to see so much pain on the face of [one you love],” he said. “When I see it, I can’t look. I just feel [despair] and helplessness, so I just move it away or I [move away].”

The heartrending image of Shiri Bibas with baby Kfir and Ariel being abducted by Hamas terrorists on October 7

Yair is in the UK for several days as part of a delegation of relatives of the hostages to meet with members of the Jewish community and to ensure the plight of their loved ones is continuing to be talked about by politicians and in mainstream British press.

On Tuesday night, Yair cried in public for the first time since October. Speaking at the JW3 Jewish community hub, he described how he “does not have enough hands” to hold all four posters of his missing family members.

He said the atmosphere of JW3 was such that he felt “comfortable and supported” enough to open up emotionally.

He said: “I haven’t cried much at all for nine months, only a [couple of times] in the beginning after the attack. I didn’t know it was going to happen [on Tuesday], but when I was there at JW3, I felt straight away, when I walked out on stage, that I was in a secure place and the room was full of love for us. I felt that the people in the room were my people; like me, are me.

“I felt everybody living through this trauma with us, and all day, I [had so many] hugs from people. I felt, that night, a feeling of [togetherness], like we are a tribe. Suddenly, all this emotion came out, and it felt okay to be broken, to show weakness in front of them. I don’t know why; I didn’t plan it, but I felt comfortable [enough] that it came out.”

Yair Keshet (right) speaks during a Q&A at JW3, with relatives of hostages Tamir Nimrodi and Guy Gilboa Dalal

Yair, naturally a brunette, dyed his hair red a month or so after the attack in a show of solidarity with his missing family members.

“Everyone in Israel who [recognises] me, I had to do something to make them remember when they look. Right now, [the conversation surrounding October 7] is slowly fading, and I didn’t want it to be forgotten or for [the Bibas family] to be forgotten.”

In the months since October, Yair has been to see his nephew’s house in Kibbutz Nir Oz, an experience he described as “really tough”.

He said: “I saw what the terrorists [did]. I saw how they tried to loot or destroy everything; it was chaos.” While there, he observed two notable things that spoke to the characters of Yarden and Shiri.

First, he recalls finding an arts and craft station belonging to Shiri, a hobby he had no idea she was interested in. He found sewing projects and wool, papier-mâché sculptures and other artistic endeavours, all evidence of her dedication to her children.

Yair Bibas, uncle of Yarden Bibas, holds hostage posters of (l-r) Shiri, Kfir, Yarden and Ariel Bibas

“I didn’t know [about] this part of her, I learned more about her when I saw this and feel closer to her now,” he said.

The second – which gave Yair a sense of pride – were smaller bullet holes alongside larger ones in the walls of the home, indicating that guns were fired in both directions through the wall, meaning Yarden likely fired his own gun at the terrorists in an attempt to defend his family.

He describes Yarden and Shiri as “always smiling and laughing”, with a great affection for abandoned animals, especially dogs, which they used to volunteer to take care of. Their own family dog, which for some days Yair thought had probably run off in the chaos of October 7, was later found shot dead under a pile of clothes inside the apartment.

Yair says four-year-old Ariel is, despite being smaller than most of the other kids his age, a “riding whizz”, whose “perfect” hand-eye coordination and spacial awareness means he is adept at riding “skateboards, bicycles – whatever it is, he can ride anything and [do it well].”

Maya Goren feeding Kfir Bibas in the kindergarden at Kibbutz Nir Oz

Responding to the news that the body of hostage Maya Goren, who was the kindergarden teacher on Kibbitz Nir Oz and looked after the Bibas children, has been recovered by the IDF and brought back to Israel, Yair says: “We did not know the late Maya Goren personally, but we heard stories about a beloved caring nanny, who worked for many years with the children of Kibbutz Nir Oz. On October 7th she was caught in the babies house, kidnapped, got injured and died in captivity.

“We hope that returning her body to Israel and bringing it to the burial she deserves next to her husband Avner, who was also murdered on the same Saturday, will bring comfort, even a small one, to her family amidst the nightmare we are all going through".

Though not particularly political people, Yarden and Shiri were strong advocates for peace between everyone, Yair said. “They want peace, security. They never [celebrated] war. They lived near Gaza, but they educated Ariel to not hate and to get along with everyone. The whole family is peaceful.”